RUDE!

When I first met Nic he would laugh often about how I classified certain things as "rude". For instance...if a cloud covered the sun while I was trying to get a tan that cloud would obviously be "rude". If I stubbed my toe on the door jam, the door jam was "rude". Etc...

Well, now something else is attacking me in a very rude way. This whole pregnancy-postpartum thing. Sigh.

As far as I know, my abdomen was the only body part that was actually pregnant. Why then, do you suppose I cannot get my jeans past my knees? My thighs weren't pregnant were they? RUDE!

How is it possible that after giving birth to a nearly nine pound baby I hop on the scale two days later and find I have lost a whopping seven pounds? RUDE!

And let's not forget the ultimate firing squad of brutal honesty...my children. I have had to give up my personal shower time and have traded it for piling me, Afton, and Evan in at once or else a shower just doesn't happen. During this morning's shower Afton asked me 1.) "Why is your belly button so big like a mole hole?" She then followed with my personal favorite 2.) "Why are your boobs so long now?" Sigh.

Now that I sleep solely on my left side to protect Jemma from Nic rolling on her I have developed this amazing zit on my left cheek. It's pretty much the biggest zit I've ever heard of in real life or in legend...I have affectionately named it Molgarath. (Watch the Spiderwick Chronicles for clarification). Here's a picture of Molgarath.

Even Nic got in on the action when one morning my naturally curly hair was particularly unruly and he told me I looked like Gene Wilder. For those of you who can't remember who that is...he played Willy Wonka on the original Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

I can't deny...he pretty much hit the nail on the head.

So, lately it can be pretty hard to look at myself. But you know what? When I get a little discouraged at what has happened to my body after three kids, this is what I do. I go pick up Jemma and I walk to a mirror and take a good look. I am a mother. I see myself holding her and know there is more to me than what I look like, what longitude my body parts are at, or if a mole would in fact enjoy burrowing in for the winter in my larger than normal belly button. I am a mother! It's pretty amazing. Jemma is pretty amazing. She's beautiful. And every night (several times a night) when she wakes up to be fed and it feels like someone Elmer's glued my eye lids shut and I can barely wake up, I can't help but take one look at her and a smile spreads across my lips because I still can't believe she is mine! I'm happy to see her every time. So I guess I just want to say...Yeah, it's important to look my best and take care of myself, but I'm trying not to dwell on the things out of my control. You know? It's not my fault these things happened anyway...my belly button is just rude.

Hello World!

Here I am in labor... on March 4th, listening to Jack Johnson whilst conjuring up a very specific memory of me riding along side my hubby on the North Shore of Oahu with my bare feet out the window looking at the ocean. You'd be amazed at how much I clung to that image and how much it helped. Earlier in the day I was picking up Afton from preschool and cursing my false labor. Only...half way back while going 80 mph on the freeway I had a pain that clearly was not false labor. So I spent the next five or six hours puttering around my house hiding in my bedroom from any noise or distraction...reading my Dr. Sears Birth book wondering... is this really it? Finally around 5:50 pm I told Nic, "You better get me to the hospital."
Southern Hills Hospital was a ghost town when I walked into the Labor and Delivery floor. I crawled up onto a bed and said, "Let's do this thing." Unfortunately I did not know that because I tested positive for beta strep I had to have four hours inbetween intrvienous antibiotic doses! Are you kidding me? I'm dialated to a five...in pretty good labor and you are saying I have to wait four more hours? I'd like to see how that's going to happen. So...the nurses treated me like a delicate piece of glass trying not to check me or let my water break as we all stared at the drip drip drip of the antibiotic bag while chanting "GO BABY GO BABY GO!" My chanting got even more sincere as I was at a seven and the nurse infomed me she wouldn't even call the anesthesiologist untill I had recieved all the medicine! Then she said, you are doing great...why don't you try it natural? I have to admit, I was tempted. Afterall, the sensation of a needle fishing around in my spinal juices is not my favorite experience. However, the sensation of delivering my first baby with the epidural shut off was oh so much more not my favorite experience. So...my bff Dr. Chen arrived and gave me my epidural and about an hour later...

Jemma Sage Larkin was born! 8 lbs. 9 oz, 20 inches long at 11:36pm.

Here's my so cool under fire Dr. Swainston. He was singing "If you leave me now, You'll take away the biggest part of me" as I was pushing her out.

Oh! So cute! Look at her pathetic litle cry!

My nurse Julie made a bow for her beanie!

My mommy.

Me with my favorite Jamba Juice, "Carribean Passion" courtesy of my mother in law Michelle. Life is good. I'm NOT pregnant...it's the day after and I've got Jamba Juice.

Afton's first meeting. When it was time for her to go she threw a huge fit which she doesn't usually do and cried, "I'm NOT leaving here without my baby sister!"

My daddy.

Loving my family visit and my new baby.

Evan checking out her toes.

Morning after Dad. Love that messy bed head.

Getting ready to go home.

Poor thing....she's so skinny:)

You'd think a muppet fathered this baby judging from her abundance of fuzziness. She's getting sunned at Grandma Michelle's big bay window for her jaundice.

Happy Daddy.

Jemma...toe up.

Afton slung up her baby just like mommy.

Thank you to all my friends and family who helped out. A special shout out to my mom who even broke her arm in the line of duty! Your three weeks here was pure heaven! Thanks to Grandma M who brought the mother load of paper products...I still haven't washed a cereal bowl. Thanks to Julie who came and got my kids and took them outside to play so I could breathe for a second...I wrote about the birth in my journal and read my scriptures:) Thanks to you all for the beautiful meals, blog comments, facebook notes and just calling to check on me. I love you all and can't wait to rejoin society:) Pardon any typos or statements that make no sense...I'm functioning on very little sleep and very wacked hormones.