I think I'll move to Australia

I remember sitting and listening to my elementary school librarian Mrs. Snedden read to my class "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day". I loved that chubby little Asian woman. And I loved that book. Fun to read. Not fun when your day actually goes like that. Not even my day...just my park outing. I am a firm believer in looking on the bright side and not dwelling on the negative, but sometimes the negative is downright comical!

So we went to the park after preschool. I made a special point to ask Afton if she needed the bathroom before we hiked on to the playground. Of course she didn't. We get to the playground. Afton starts walking around with her knees together and her butt poking out. She needed the bathroom. So we did our business in those disgusting park bathrooms...washed hands...purelled for good measure....went back to the park. No less than five minutes later...Afton is doing the weird chicken dance again. We hike all the way back to the bathroom which had wet mystery puddles all over the floor that smelled...and she had well....deposited a special nugget in her Minnie mouse panties. Great! So I squatted down to help get her undressed and my pants split from stem to stern.

I think if I weren't such a germophobe my life would be much less dramatic. Trying to undress Afton without her feet touching the wet smelly floor almost put me into a full out panic attack! So while I am squatting in my newly drafty pants trying to get her pants back on her Evan decides to go ape crap and run at me full speed for a linebacker style tackle. Ahhh!!! People falling over in smelly puddles....undisinfected poop hands....Evan rolling around on the aforementioned floor...Ahhh!! That is IT! SOMEBODY'S GETTING A SPANKING!

Calming myself...pulling up pants...washing hands....re-purelling...ahh....I love the antiseptic smell of alcohol....

We hike back to the playground. Evan says, "Mommy I poopy". Huff. Okay, he's a baby, he can't control his pooping times. He can't help it that we have been at the park for 30 minutes and only five of those minutes haven't included cleaning someones hiney. So we find a bench to change and he goes nuts because the sun is in his eyes...starts screaming and kicking which causes untold cups of sand trapped in the folds of his pants to sprinkle out and stick to his butt....that makes him scream even louder because it is scratchy when I wipe him...my head is killing me...Afton is saying..."Mommy, are you mad? Is this a bad day?"

Yes Afton. This is kind of a bad day. So apologies had to be made for my ranting...hugs given...a little prayer offered to help me be better at keeping it together...Phew. I'm exhausted. Luckily my kids are quick to forgive and I had three bites of Ben and Jerry's Pumpkin Cheesecake left in the freezer when I got home. But I'm still wearing my ripped pants.

Shut your Pie Hole!

I had an interesting experience today. I usually don't share my personal religious feelings on my blog...I keep it kinda light...but I know I have a lot of mommy friends that blog with me and I think this applies to our lives. It's early Saturday morning and I just finished up preparing my lesson for Sunday school tomorrow. It was about looking forward to Christ's second coming and remaining strong in the face of fear and temptation. One of the main points the lesson made was that as we strive to to what's right Satan increases his forces upon us.

Well, this morning I tried to do what was right. I passed on wasting the morning on a t.v. show I know wouldn't spiritually help me. I prayed before my lesson. I felt the spirit as I prepared and really got excited about sharing my testimony of those principles in my class tomorrow. I ended my lesson with a prayer and thanked Heavenly Father for helping me feel so darn excited about the scriptures...that's a hard thing for me so I was extra grateful. Here's where it gets weird.

I don't pretend to understand how Satan operates. I don't know logistically how his ideas end up in our heads or exactly how he tempts us. But I'll tell you what I do know and what happened this morning. I came out of my bedroom feeling on top of the world, ready to tackle my shopping list and clip coupons and really get my stuff in order for the Sabbath and to have a great day with my family. I sat down to eat my delicious breakfast tacos and these are the sentences that entered my head.

"YOU HAVE NO CALL TO BE HAPPY. YOU ARE A SLAVE TO YOUR FAMILY AND SHOPPING FOR THEM AND CLEANING THE HOUSE IS MEANINGLESS. YOU ARE STUPID TO BE EXCITED FOR YOUR DAY BECAUSE THERE IS SO MUCH MORE OUT THERE TO MAKE YOU HAPPY."

I just want to tell you how blown away I was by those thoughts. I clearly know they were not mine. They were the total opposite to what I was feeling just seconds before and though I don't know exactly how Satan works...I know those were his ideas and not mine. So I told him to SHUT HIS PIE HOLE!

Even as I write this I feel the confirmation that what I am saying is true. I love being a mother and a wife and I just want to say that it is worth it and that keeping a home and feeding and nurturing my family is an errand from God. That's all. Thanks for listening.

My sous chefs

Nic came home the other day and payed me the sweetest compliments for letting the kids cook with me. Although it's messy, it takes longer and it's not convenient.... He thanked me for creating happy memories for the kids. The little stinkers always find their way into the kitchen and here's some photos of what we've cooked together lately.
Evan Mutilating some snow peas for the stir fry



Peeling peaches from my parent's ranch for Pablo Peach Pie!


Making pizza dough


Bean Salad


BBQ Kabobs

And for those of you tisk tisking...wondering if I ever clothe my children, I swear I do, they just end up like that somehow!

Doggy Bags

Do you know why I love my husband? He brings me doggy bags. Every once in a while he gets to go out to a mega-swanky dinner for his work. Since the first one a year and a half ago he has never failed to bring me a doggy bag. It's a big deal to him. At this time in our lives we rarely go out for that kind of meal...spending two weeks grocery money in one night type thing...and I think he feels guilty that I'm home with the kids while he dines with adults. While I'm giving night time baths, some tuxedoed dude is turning on the water in the men's room so he can wash fillet Mignon grease from his fingertips. He wishes I could be there to experience it with him, so...

He eats exactly half of his meal. Last night he brought me two jumbo prawns, half of a lobster tail, half of a fillet Mignon, half a scoop of potatoes, and half of a slice of strawberry cheesecake. My doggy bags always come beautifully presented in fancy packaging and he will sit with me on the couch and describe how everything tasted when it was served and how it was presented. He will tell me what the dinner conversation was and what the restaurant looked like inside. He described how the waiters were dressed and even how the alcohol smelled that was served to some of the people.

This morning I heated up my fillet in the oven, shared my potatoes with Evan and enjoyed my cheesecake. (I was freaked out about eating day old seafood...so with much regret I tossed the prawns and lobster tail...is that just an urban legend or does seafood not keep overnight?) Nic teased me about being an uncultured sloth because I speared the whole hunk of meat with a fork and dipped it in KC masterpiece BBQ sauce. But then he laughed and said, "It's your present, eat it how you want."

Thank you honey for doing the little things that mean so much. I love you.